User Profile

Hello to whoever you may be.
My name is Audrey, and I reside in the more hypocritical, urban bit of Colorado. I'm that child that grew up knowing what being a "faggot" was by age two, exactly how to spell onomonopia without goofing it all up by age four, and the exact "how-to" on conceiving a child by the age of five. My biological father left when I was an infant, and I've not only made due with the father that I've had for the past fifteen years of my life, but have enjoyed every moment of it. My family is a lively bunch, or at least, my immediate family. The most commonly used words used in my house are: retard, stupid, "that's gay", whatever, and why. There's is this common misconception that we are a normal, five person household. I'm not really sure how that assumption came to life, but surely enough, it did, so we must be playing off the inner-city-wanting-to-be-suburban mask really well!

I am constantly on the look out for the lastest and newest gadgets. In fact, the latest gadget I encountered was this miraculous invention called the 'TV'. It's a wonderous piece of machinery! It's much like the radio, only with moving images. A very creative invention!
...I can hear Kale, my long-term boyfriend, now. "Did you just try to crack a joke?! Hahaha!"... Our relationship is wonderful.

In the past years of my life, I've come to find that things aren't always what they seem to be. For example, if a preist tells you that he is completely and totally, 100% anti-homosexual, he's most likely a gay-in-hiding who fumbles around with local gay prostitues. Another great example is that if your nations leader pledges to invade and conqure a country who provides your oil supply without the prices rising dramatically, he's a walletstabbing liar.
As for my friends, well, they're at a, shall we say, limited supply. I know many a'people, but I've met few who I connect with on a deeper level.
I don't party, which comes to most as shock.

"What do you meannnn you don't party?!"
-The dumbass who got smashed last weekend

I hope to one day be a world-renowned surgeon, who is filthy rich. I'm not certain of exactly what type of surgeon, but I have considered cardio-surgeon or a reconstructive plastic surgeon.
I'm not an emotional reck, I want to marry a man with high sperm count, and I don't look forward to facing grey hair or hours of child labor. I don't approve narcotics and I try to avoid intimidating black men on the hunt for booty. Get to know me, won't you please? I'd love to hear about you.

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